It’s been one week. One week since my now-ex boyfriend and I broke up. And yes, by broke up I mean he instigated the conversation. Okay fine, he broke up with me. He had reached the point where he could no longer turn a blind eye to my obvious lack of passion for the long-distance relationship that had been my life for the last 10 months. I was being a pussy about facing it and finding ways to stay emotionally engaged. He finally called me out on it and put his foot down. He wasn’t going to put up with it anymore. He initially said he was going to give me a few days to just think about it, then broke up with me the next night.
I don’t think this would have happened if he had not moved away for a new job. I don’t blame him for moving away but it certainly shed a light on his priorities and as a result put my own priorities into perspective.I was getting ready to move to his shitty little state to be with him and ended up deciding not to do so. I realized that he moved away from me for a job and I needed to do the same, respect myself and my personal and career goals, and staying here was the right choice to do that.
The slow death of our relationship over the last couple months had made me reflect on all the relationships I have had in my life, from a one-night stand to this longest year and four months relationship. I have dated so many different types of people, had some beautiful relationships, learned many life lessons, had some regrets but each one was special in its own way. I believe everyone you meet comes into your life for a reason and it’s just up to you to at least appreciate that they did – whether they have a negative or positive impact – and even if you don’t understand what their purpose is within your life.
As a result of my reflection I have decided to revisit every single relationship so far (that I can remember) from my short 20-something years on this earth. I want to create a tribute to each of those individuals that have had an impact on my life with the memory of each of them occupying its own “chapter” in my life and in this series. Most chapters will be short, a few will be very long. I am calling this “In Memory of a Relationship” series. I have not thought of many of the men I will talk about in a long time, though a few I tend to remember quite often.This series is my way of honoring the preciousness of a human connection that was had between myself and another, of paying homage to each man and the relationship had with him with the intention of, by the end, laying this last relationship to rest and being at peace with it and him.
To follow soon…
In Memory of A Relationship
*Names will be changed as an extra precautionary measure regardless of the fact that I hide my identity.